Why Your Paleo Diet Didn’t Work...
The paleo diet (also known as the paleolithic diet, caveman diet, hunter-gatherer diet, etc) is a nutritional plan based on the type of foods allegedly consumed by our stone-age ancestors. Their diet is presumed to have been made up of wild animals, fish, nuts and seeds, plants and generally anything that could have been either hunted or foraged during the paleolithic era (a period of about 2.5 million years, ending about 10,000 years ago with the development of agriculture)
The general idea behind it is that humans were never stronger, healthier or sexier than they were during the paleolithic era. They had no toothpaste, nail clippers, hair-removal technology, deodorant or crab combs… But that apparently isn’t the point - science says they were shredded and well endowed with triumphant veiny biceps and showed no evidence of osteoporosis, diabetes or arthritis.... Possibly because they only lived to 25, but whatever...
I mean, I’m just saying it’s hard to be old and fat if you get eaten at the age of 22… But you know, whatever…
And Jesus, the diet promised so much! And it all sounded so good! And you gave it a good college try, damn it! So why are you now, after a month of too many vegetables, surprising bowel movements and many, many nights of crying, WHY are you NOW still just as doughy, if not MORE doughy, than when you started? Why are you still tired? Why do you still suck so hard?
Well, there are a couple of reasons…
1. You Didn’t Eat Enough...
Most active people do not eat enough.
As a rough guideline, most people have a basal metabolic rate of around 100 kcal an hour. This means that you burn around 100 kcal per hour just sitting down and watching TV…
Many years ago the FDA decided that 2000 was the ideal amount of calories to be consumed by the average person.
Well what the hell is average?
- A labourer who lifts weights 3 times a week?
- An admin assistant who likes computer games?
- A mother of 3 who swims twice a week?
- A lawyer training for a half marathon?
Well f*** you, FDA… Any adult with any sort of activity level will need more than 2000 kcal per day or they will risk entering “starvation mode” - essentially where your metabolism slows down to the point where weight loss grinds to a halt and in some cases even reverses…
What would a paleo diet for an active adult or a high intensity athlete look like?
As written by Robb Wolf himself: “Do it strict if you do not feel well. Do it religiously if you have a serious illness. Play with carb intake... If you are really active, particularly in glycogen demanding sports, I think you will need a decent amount of carbs...”
"Play with carb intake" is very important. Active people need carbs. If you don’t believe me, do prowler intervals or hill sprints on a keto diet, then do the same on a diet with carbs. The difference is un-freaking-believable. If you are training intensely your Paleo diet should not look the same as a sedentary individual.
2. You Ate Way Too Much Of The Stuff You Knew You Should Have Limited…
The food industry is full of sneaky b*******. Just because something is labelled as organic or gluten free doesn’t mean it is good for you.
- Just because almond butter is paleo doesn’t mean you can eat half a kilo of it in one go.
- Just because someone has created a paleo cheesecake doesn’t mean you can eat a whole one at every single meal.
- Just because heroin is made with 100% natural, vegan, organic poppy seeds doesn’t mean you should shoot up every morning…
The point here is fairly simple: while you were encouraged to experiment with different foods and flavours on the Paleo diet, you were also warned of hyper palatable foods (aka. delicious b*******). Research has shown sugar to have the same chemical effects on the obese as alcohol on an alcoholic - keep that in mind - honey and maple syrup are both “paleo”, but both are still sugar, and delicious and moreish A.F... Someone looking to lose weight will find it just as hard to do so eating “Paleo Death by Chocolate Brownies and Paleo Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough” as they would eating Ben & Jerry’s and sinking half a dozen rum and cokes...
Try to choose foods that are nutrient dense, good for gut health and anti inflammatory, not calorie dense, hyper palatable foods that are meant to be eaten in moderation... Basically, eat to live, don’t live to eat you tubby, weak-willed little sod.
3. Your Sleep Was F***ed Up
When you sleep, you recover and grow. You also fight off diseases and all other sorts of sickness and bull****... During this time, your body also strives for hormonal balance, replenishing hormones responsible for a lean and healthy body that performs at work, in the gym, on the field and in the bedroom.
If your sleep is abysmal, you are abysmal. Let that sink in.
Want better sleep? You need:
- A pitch dark, quiet and cool room.
- Eliminate blue light (and preferably electronics) at least 1 hour before bed.
- Reduce or even eliminate caffeine - I try not to touch any after 1400...
- Consider traditional herbal remedies.
If you still struggle, manage your stress better. Seriously, few things are as bad as you think they are… Go play with the dog and forget your worries for a while.
4. You Trained Too Much
I’m not an expert on paleolithic man, but I’m pretty sure he didn’t do heavy olympic lifting and brutal metabolic conditioning 6 days a week… I’m guessing he slept a lot, ate loads of fatty meat, tracked prey over long distances, sprinted in short bursts and carried heavy stuff back to camp…
Even Crossfit.com typically makes use of a “hard, easy, hard, off” template… Four days, usually comprised of one heavy day, one intense metcon lasting around 10 minutes, one skill or longer duration session, and one day completely off.
Now, no gym is going to close every fourth day to ensure its members get adequate rest... That is up to the members to manage, which is a problem, because left to their own devices, they’ll do 10 sets of 15 back squats just because… … Just because.
To add muscle, you should do the least necessary to trigger specific muscles and hormonal growth mechanisms. Doing more simply adds to your recovery time, and if you’re familiar with the supercompensation model you will know this is not ideal, especially if you intend to train again soon... Doing more than an effective dose is wasteful and a predictable path for plateaus…
Training sessions do not need to be horrendous to be effective, and too many horrendous ones will send your cortisol sky high and ensure that your performance and body composition goals remain stagnant.
There we have it, why your Paleo diet didn’t work...
~ Coach Collins
Copyright 2017
The paleo diet (also known as the paleolithic diet, caveman diet, hunter-gatherer diet, etc) is a nutritional plan based on the type of foods allegedly consumed by our stone-age ancestors. Their diet is presumed to have been made up of wild animals, fish, nuts and seeds, plants and generally anything that could have been either hunted or foraged during the paleolithic era (a period of about 2.5 million years, ending about 10,000 years ago with the development of agriculture)
The general idea behind it is that humans were never stronger, healthier or sexier than they were during the paleolithic era. They had no toothpaste, nail clippers, hair-removal technology, deodorant or crab combs… But that apparently isn’t the point - science says they were shredded and well endowed with triumphant veiny biceps and showed no evidence of osteoporosis, diabetes or arthritis.... Possibly because they only lived to 25, but whatever...
I mean, I’m just saying it’s hard to be old and fat if you get eaten at the age of 22… But you know, whatever…
And Jesus, the diet promised so much! And it all sounded so good! And you gave it a good college try, damn it! So why are you now, after a month of too many vegetables, surprising bowel movements and many, many nights of crying, WHY are you NOW still just as doughy, if not MORE doughy, than when you started? Why are you still tired? Why do you still suck so hard?
Well, there are a couple of reasons…
1. You Didn’t Eat Enough...
Most active people do not eat enough.
As a rough guideline, most people have a basal metabolic rate of around 100 kcal an hour. This means that you burn around 100 kcal per hour just sitting down and watching TV…
Many years ago the FDA decided that 2000 was the ideal amount of calories to be consumed by the average person.
Well what the hell is average?
- A labourer who lifts weights 3 times a week?
- An admin assistant who likes computer games?
- A mother of 3 who swims twice a week?
- A lawyer training for a half marathon?
Well f*** you, FDA… Any adult with any sort of activity level will need more than 2000 kcal per day or they will risk entering “starvation mode” - essentially where your metabolism slows down to the point where weight loss grinds to a halt and in some cases even reverses…
What would a paleo diet for an active adult or a high intensity athlete look like?
As written by Robb Wolf himself: “Do it strict if you do not feel well. Do it religiously if you have a serious illness. Play with carb intake... If you are really active, particularly in glycogen demanding sports, I think you will need a decent amount of carbs...”
"Play with carb intake" is very important. Active people need carbs. If you don’t believe me, do prowler intervals or hill sprints on a keto diet, then do the same on a diet with carbs. The difference is un-freaking-believable. If you are training intensely your Paleo diet should not look the same as a sedentary individual.
2. You Ate Way Too Much Of The Stuff You Knew You Should Have Limited…
The food industry is full of sneaky b*******. Just because something is labelled as organic or gluten free doesn’t mean it is good for you.
- Just because almond butter is paleo doesn’t mean you can eat half a kilo of it in one go.
- Just because someone has created a paleo cheesecake doesn’t mean you can eat a whole one at every single meal.
- Just because heroin is made with 100% natural, vegan, organic poppy seeds doesn’t mean you should shoot up every morning…
The point here is fairly simple: while you were encouraged to experiment with different foods and flavours on the Paleo diet, you were also warned of hyper palatable foods (aka. delicious b*******). Research has shown sugar to have the same chemical effects on the obese as alcohol on an alcoholic - keep that in mind - honey and maple syrup are both “paleo”, but both are still sugar, and delicious and moreish A.F... Someone looking to lose weight will find it just as hard to do so eating “Paleo Death by Chocolate Brownies and Paleo Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough” as they would eating Ben & Jerry’s and sinking half a dozen rum and cokes...
Try to choose foods that are nutrient dense, good for gut health and anti inflammatory, not calorie dense, hyper palatable foods that are meant to be eaten in moderation... Basically, eat to live, don’t live to eat you tubby, weak-willed little sod.
3. Your Sleep Was F***ed Up
When you sleep, you recover and grow. You also fight off diseases and all other sorts of sickness and bull****... During this time, your body also strives for hormonal balance, replenishing hormones responsible for a lean and healthy body that performs at work, in the gym, on the field and in the bedroom.
If your sleep is abysmal, you are abysmal. Let that sink in.
Want better sleep? You need:
- A pitch dark, quiet and cool room.
- Eliminate blue light (and preferably electronics) at least 1 hour before bed.
- Reduce or even eliminate caffeine - I try not to touch any after 1400...
- Consider traditional herbal remedies.
If you still struggle, manage your stress better. Seriously, few things are as bad as you think they are… Go play with the dog and forget your worries for a while.
4. You Trained Too Much
I’m not an expert on paleolithic man, but I’m pretty sure he didn’t do heavy olympic lifting and brutal metabolic conditioning 6 days a week… I’m guessing he slept a lot, ate loads of fatty meat, tracked prey over long distances, sprinted in short bursts and carried heavy stuff back to camp…
Even Crossfit.com typically makes use of a “hard, easy, hard, off” template… Four days, usually comprised of one heavy day, one intense metcon lasting around 10 minutes, one skill or longer duration session, and one day completely off.
Now, no gym is going to close every fourth day to ensure its members get adequate rest... That is up to the members to manage, which is a problem, because left to their own devices, they’ll do 10 sets of 15 back squats just because… … Just because.
To add muscle, you should do the least necessary to trigger specific muscles and hormonal growth mechanisms. Doing more simply adds to your recovery time, and if you’re familiar with the supercompensation model you will know this is not ideal, especially if you intend to train again soon... Doing more than an effective dose is wasteful and a predictable path for plateaus…
Training sessions do not need to be horrendous to be effective, and too many horrendous ones will send your cortisol sky high and ensure that your performance and body composition goals remain stagnant.
There we have it, why your Paleo diet didn’t work...
~ Coach Collins
Copyright 2017
